young actress

After your Child Actor Audition – Waiting, Hoping and Releasing

If you are the parent of a young actor or actress and your child begins to audition, you will find yourself in the cycle of them auditioning and then waiting and hoping for a callback. I find that our own child actress asks me for the next week or two if I’ve heard anything back. I remind her that I will let her know right away if we do hear anything, however, she asks from time to time, anyways, as it is somewhere in her mind.

And in addition to her thinking about it and asking me, I used to think about it a lot too. Until, one day, after hearing from some others that they don’t even think about it post-audition, they just literally “RELEASE IT.”  Release it, just like you would release a fish off of a hook OR a butterfly into the open air. Once I heard that it was enough for me, I stopped thinking about auditions once they were over.

boy actorThe post audition process for her and I (I’m usually the one to take her to auditions) goes something like this now:
1) directly after the audition, once we are in the car, she downloads to me the entire experience of the audition from start to finish.
2) from that, if there was any redirection from the casting director, I ask her what she learned from this audition. We discuss how she might use that in her next audition. This is a very important part. As, if anything didn’t go great, at least she can take what she learned and put that positive energy into the next one. She then puts it into her own words so she has it in her mind. She also writes it into a journal.
3) we next agree to just let it go and let the universe do it’s thing, no matter what that is. This is the hardest part of course, as her feelings of working so hard on the copy or sides and literally eating/breathing that role for the past 24 hours to a week or longer are still sitting inside her mind and her body. She is still feeling it, as if the role is right on her fingertips. More on this #3 below.

So how do you release the audition results and handle the post-audition?
child actressThere is actually a graceful way to do this, you and your child just need to let it go and simply release the audition results into the universe. At this point in time, you have absolutely no control over anything. Also, you may or may not even hear anything eventually – in other words if you do not get a callback, you may never hear another thing on this audition. It is unfortunately quite common to hear no feedback and no results from anyone. Please do not take this personally. There is just no time for casting directors to provide this information.

The timing of hearing on a callback for your child actor can be from the actual day of the audition to a year later, so the timing is completely out of your hands. So if you are waiting to hear and you keep saying you are waiting, you will certainly drive yourself nutty. There is no point to even keep saying that you are waiting. You should not be thinking about this or dwelling on it. Instead, focus on the day at hand and what is going on in your current moment and day.

Also completely out of your hands is: 1) how your child actually performed in the audition room; 2) what the casting director thought of your child; 3) how your child stacked up against all of the other actors that tried out for the role. 4) if the role is even right for your child’s exact look, tone, pace, experience, height, weight, hair, eyes, and many other factors. Nothing you can control.

Be glad your child got the audition, as that is great experience for them and will help them in their next ones. Also, take with you both what they learned, and remind them on the next audition. Lastly, if they did well but were not right for the part, it’s possible the casting director will remember them for another role.

If you are having trouble letting go still, distract yourselves with fun things. Make sure that your child is involved in things outside of acting, as acting should not be the only things they do in their lives. Go with them to rollerskating or take the bikes out for a long ride. Set up some fun things over the next weeks, adventures, sports, other hobbies that they can dive into.

As we have been told, the role your child lands may be their 1st or their 250th audition. If they really love this, and it’s their dream, they just need to keep going with it.

keeping the dream aliveWe’ve all been there, I can tell you I personally have. I’ve just learned to turn off the record in my head on it, and move onward. This is best for our entire family. It’s stress-free. I also truly believe by doing this, it opens up possibilities and allows the next opportunity to roll in for our child actress.

So….don’t dwell on the acting auditions that your child had today, yesterday or last week, as that will just start to eat at you and your family. I was there at one point very early on in this journey and I took the advice of others. You too can learn to release the audition results, with your child. Start doing it today, you will see a difference in their overall happiness and their dreams will continue.

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6 comments on “After your Child Actor Audition – Waiting, Hoping and Releasing

  1. Thanks for this! I feel like my young actress can “let it go” after the audition better than I do. I love your concept of releasing it to the universe. We shall try that in 4 days after her next slated audition.

    • Mom of an Actress

      Thanks for sharing that! Let us know how it goes when you give it a try post-audition. Our young actress had 2 auditions yesterday, and we released it upon driving away “after” the 2nd audition. It used to be hard for me, but it’s gotten way easier now. Good luck to your daughter on the audition!

  2. Good to read, my daughter got a callback for a lead role in a west end production and was recalled till the final 5 girls, they were all told they would get a call and a month later nothing!! She had an amazing audition so Inhave today said let it go!!!!
    Just frustrating that a yes no or feedback can’t be part of the letting go
    Thanks -)

    • Thanks for sharing that, Jo! Yes, we’ve experienced this as well and so have so many others…Oftentimes in this field there is a no response. A no response doesn’t mean anything. I’ve now attended over 30 plus workshops run by casting directors and others in the last many years and they’ve all said the same thing. A no hear doesn’t mean anything. Not hearing could be 100 different reasons. To give you another example. 2 years ago, our actress made it to the final round for another feature film (she’d just been in 2 other films previous to this one) Anyways, so excited and then well, just silence, heard nothing. Eventually came to find out that the production was no longer going forward. Hearts sank but we released it and let it go. And, we didn’t take anything personally.

      The way I’ve started to look at it is letting go is letting go. If you are thinking about it or holding on to anything at all, then you have not really let go…It’s not easy letting go…In fact, even in this moment, as I write this, stuff comes up where I wish we had known this or that. But, it just takes a moment for me to remember, that was not supposed to be the one for her…there will be others…and that’s what’s so exciting about all of this…After letting go, knowing something will be next and if they keep the passion, the training and they truly love it, then their things will come!

      I’m glad you got a good read out of this, thanks for the input! Wishing your daughter the very best! I totally feel your heart. I absolutely get it. And, we are on this journey, together! Please stay in touch. Are you in London or near there?

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